Why the future of All Star coaching depends on psychology, communication, and athlete-first leadership.
When Leadership Shapes the Mindset
When a coach tells an athlete to “just trust yourself,” they usually mean well.
But what if trust isn’t the problem?
In gyms across the country, athletes are pushing harder, training younger, and internalizing the message that their value lies in performance. Many of those messages come from a good place, small phrases repeated on the mat that echo for years.
As one coach put it, “We coach the way we were coached — and that’s the problem.”
But the mental health crisis in All Star cheer doesn’t start with athletes. It starts with leadership.
The Weight Coaches Carry
Most coaches in cheer come from within the sport – passionate, loyal, often self-taught.
But it is incredibly rare to see even one coach within a gym receive formal training in child psychology, emotional regulation, or trauma-informed communication.
They learned how to spot a rolled ankle or a hyperextended knee. Recognizing anxiety, depression, or fear-based shutdown is far beyond their ability.
Jeff Benson, a clinically-trained mental performance coach and founder of Mind Body Cheer, explains: “What looks like low effort or attitude is often a stress response in the body. When coaches don’t recognize that, they may take the athlete’s actions personally instead of seeing them as a symptom of overwhelm.”
According to a 2023 report from the U.S. Center for SafeSport, 70% of youth athletes say they’ve witnessed a coach use dismissive or intimidating behavior, and nearly half report coaches ignoring emotional distress — especially during high-pressure moments like blocks or performance anxiety. And yet, after two decades and meeting thousands of coaches, I beg to argue that these same coaches deeply care about their athletes.
They simply have never been taught how to support them.
The Leadership Paradox
Coaches are taught to build resilience in their athletes, but rarely how to nurture it.
In many gyms, toughness is mistaken for silence; focus for fearlessness. When athletes cry, hesitate, or freeze, coaches often lean on motivation tactics that worked for them a decade or more ago: push harder, shout louder, “earn your spot.”
But modern sports psychology tells a different story. Emotional safety isn’t the opposite of discipline, it’s the foundation of performance. Benson emphasizes that emotional safety isn’t soft. It’s what helps athletes thrive in high pressured moments.
At Ohio State University, football coach Ryan Day rebuilt his program around mental health. His “Circle of Care” model employs psychiatrists, sports psychologists, and counselors as integral staff. It’s proof that mental health and competitiveness aren’t enemies — they’re allies.
Day emphasizes that supporting mental health builds resilience, not weakness.
When Words Become Wounds
Cheerleaders hear roughly 30,000 feedback statements per season from coaches, judges, and teammates. Psychologists call that coaching language density — and it is important we understand what that means. Each piece of feedback, intentional or not, shapes how athletes perceive their own worth, ability, and belonging.
Joanna Gamper Cuthbert, author of Squad Safe: A Practical Guide to Athlete Welfare and Culture Change in Cheerleading, says language is one of the most overlooked performance tools in sports. She notes that while physical training has evolved, communication, and support often haven’t — and the gap is catching up to the sport.
“Over time, cheerleading skills have advanced to become increasingly complex and elite, yet the communication practices surrounding athletes haven’t kept up. The sport currently lacks the sports science, psychology, and coach-development frameworks that typically evolve alongside high-performance environments and it’s at the detriment of athlete welfare. When athletes feel psychologically safe and self-motivated – not driven by fear, threats, or shaming – their performance improves. We need a complete overhaul of coach education, one that treats communication, psychology, sports science, and safeguarding as being just as essential as skill acquisition, because ultimately, they are vital contributors to it.”
Gamper Cuthbert’s book Squad Safe offers coaches tools to recognise emotional triggers, manage stress responses, and foster psychological safety alongside physical safety.
Coaching Under Pressure
Behind the smiles and scoresheets, coaches themselves are burning out at an alarming rate.
They face financial strain, unrealistic parental expectations, and unrelenting schedules.
A 2023 survey by the U.S. Center for SafeSport found that 72% of youth coaches experience symptoms of compassion fatigue, the exhaustion that comes from constant emotional caretaking. As a previous gym owner and coach, I can confirm I’ve seen this in my staff, my colleagues, and myself.
Unlike teachers or counselors, coaches often have no structured supervision or wellness resources. When they’re struggling, there’s nowhere to go. And often, gym owners have to be on the lookout for their staff, their athletes, and themselves.
That’s why programs like Mind Body Cheer, More Than Skill, and Squad Safe are essential.
They don’t just help athletes — they train coaches to manage their own mental load.
The New Definition of Toughness
Toughness used to mean “don’t quit.”
Now, it should mean “don’t suffer in silence.”
The next generation of coaching will be defined by emotional intelligence, not intimidation.
By self-awareness, not shame.
By understanding that rest and recovery aren’t indulgent, but essential.
“We’ve pushed physical training forward, but our understanding of the mind hasn’t kept up, ” Benson says. “Mental Poise is the next evolution. It’s not about pushing harder; it’s about aligning your actions with your values, your purpose, and the person you want to be.”
Building the Coach’s Circle of Care
Every gym, regardless of budget or size, can start building its own “Circle of Care” today. We will be diving deeper into practical steps and tools to build your Circle of Care in future installments of this mental health series. For now, let’s review the five core principles needed:
1. Establish a Wellness Protocol:
Make emotional check-ins part of safety briefings, not afterthoughts.
2. Train Coaches on Emotional Regulation:
Include short modules on recognizing anxiety, trauma, or burnout.
3. Integrate Parents:
Educate families on mental health language and boundaries.
4. Partner with Experts:
Bring in professionals — sports psychologists, counselors, or mentors — for seasonal workshops.
5. Model Balance:
Coaches must show and model that self-care and boundaries are vital to elite performance, not its opposite.
Free Resource for Coaches
For coaches ready to start integrating evidence-based mindset work, More Than Skill, created by mental performance specialist Kara Frair, offers a free downloadable tool: Mental Strategy for Comp Day
It’s designed to help coaches guide athletes through emotional regulation, confidence dips, and performance anxiety — and provides language coaches can use immediately in practice.
A Shift Already Underway
Gyms across the U.S. are quietly redefining what leadership looks like.
Some host “mental wellness days.” Others integrate team journaling or mindfulness warmups.
It’s slow, imperfect, and long overdue, but things are happening.
And if the industry can make this shift, the payoff will be enormous:
Fewer blocks. Fewer breakdowns.
Longer athlete careers. Healthier teams.
Better human beings.
Additional Resources for Coaches & Gym Owners
- Mind Body Cheer – Jeff Benson’s mental performance and coach education platform.
- Squad Safe – Joanna Gamper Cuthbert’s athlete welfare and culture change guide.
- More Than Skill – Kara Frair’s mindset tools and emotional regulation strategies for coaches and athletes.
- U.S. Center for SafeSport – Free online courses on emotional misconduct prevention.
- NAMI: Mental Health Toolkit – Resources for managing mental health in youth sports.
My Final Thought
“The hardest lesson in coaching isn’t how to win — it’s how to listen. And when we start listening, the athletes start thriving.”
Because the health of our sport can only be as strong as the health of those who lead it.
